Swedish, deep tissue and sports massage - all the ways that we pretty much get. However, as I progress in my career in the field of massage, I met some really fancy sound massages offered there. As useful or good as they can be, their names do not serve them more justice. Here is what has come to me so far:
Rolfing. Is it a massage technique or a new buzzword to take off?
Myofacial Release. Sounds naughty to me. Just saying.
Lymphatic drainage. Gross! Why did anyone ever ask for it? Looks like what you need after surgery.
Structural integration. Looks like what the therapist prescribed.
Oshiatsu. Isn't that a dog?
Craniosacral therapy. Looks like a recovery plan after a brain injury.
Removing injury. Well, dang. Pin me up I mean, doesn't everyone need it after their first marriage?
Zero balancing. Looks like my current account.
Tellington Touch. Touch and say. Come on, for real?
Good. Good. That is all I have. Although a lot of them. Please do not misunderstand me. I am a psychotherapist and I really respect these modalities and their creators. But, you must admit. This is really funny. And if you are like me, you have heard of some of these modalities that the therapist offers without any explanation, none of which sounds least attractive, and leaves us to fill in the blanks.
We are unlikely to seek, let alone pay for these services; no matter how good they are. They really should have come up with better names. This is another reason why I specialize in simple and simple relaxation massage. It feels great, and you do not need to carry a medical dictionary with you to find out what's on the menu.
